I sent a text, mostly because I can be a total bitch when it comes face to face. I told him, we needed to figure shit out or we needed to do u s both a favor and separate because being happy is what I want for the both of us.
I was having a fucked up day at work as it was, so I was in and out of reality. I knew once he got the text his mind would be racing. I got a response back that said we can talk when I am ready. How do I ever begin?
The surgeon that I work for a few days a week stress me out to the point that I can't concentrate. But I push through because I love my job. I am still learning some of his surgeries and when I am at work I give more than 100%, so its hard to focus on the shit going on at home. I would call it shit some days, other days I would call it a happy marriage, but its hard to tell when husbands pissy fits have been occurring more than usual.
I come home from work, and crack open a beer. Tend to the garden, water my flowers, fill the bird feeders and round up the kiddos to talk about their day in school. We have talked about having another baby, but my youngest is almost in double digits, and again, my work is so demanding. Most mom to be's leave on maternity and then don't come back.
I'm coastin.
Looking forward to my trip to San Diego next week. Then what? Only the road will know.